Noiseless Chatter Archive

  ALF Reviews: “Try to Remember” (Season 1, Episode 16) I…yeah. Episode sixteen is a clip show. Take a moment to let that sink in. We’re barely halfway through the first season, and already there’s a clip show. I do understand the value of clips shows. I don’t particularly  like  them, but I understand why they exist. It’s a relatively fast and inexpensive way to add another episode to the running order, and in the days before complete season DVDs, they were often the only way to re-live favorite moments from years ago. Personally, I was always disappointed when I made a point of watching a show I enjoyed only to find out that the “all-new episode” was a clip show. Stitching together moments leads to a disjointed viewing experience that dulls the effect of even the best gags, as all of the context is removed. Clip shows try to follow the lead of “Greatest Hits” albums by including all of the things you remember in one convenient package, but in practice they turn out more...

We’re down to a matter of days, now! So far we’ve had some great submissions, and we expect even more as the deadline approaches. Since the deadline is Friday the 31st, I’ve decided to keep submissions open until midnight on Sunday, February 2. Closing the submission window right before a nice, meaty weekend of revision time just didn’t feel right, so congratulations…you’ve got yourself another 48 hours to craft one hell of a terrible video game novelization. Read the rules here , and get to work! If the submissions so far are any indication, you’ll be in great company. And stay tuned here…because we should have lots of news relatively soon, including the grand reveal of our final cover. As well as info on physical copies. PHYSICAL COPIES? YES I SAID THAT If you still haven’t started your submission, don’t fret. The Worlds of Power series practically cries out for a half-assed rushjob. Just think about which NES game you’d like to novelize, and then mishandle it ...

  Reflections on Russell Johnson’s Passing Last week, Russell Johnson died. It was a name that I recognized, but it’s not the name I thought of when I saw his picture. I didn’t even think of the name of his character. I thought of his descriptor. This man was The Professor. I’m not going to make the case that  Gilligan’s Island  was brilliant television. I will, however, stand pretty firmly in my opinion that it was good for what it was, and had probably the most perfect sitcom casting this side of  Arrested Development . His death doesn’t get me reflecting as deeply on my childhood as  the death of Jerry Nelson  did. But it certainly does cause me to look backward, to exhume long-ignored memories, to remember simpler times in the world of entertainment. I wasn’t alive during the original run of  Gilligan’s Island , but I’d be surprised if there was a single episode I haven’t seen. It was in near-constant syndication when I was growing up, and it was a...

  ALF Reviews: “I’ve Got a New Attitude” (Season 1, Episode 15) Well, lucky us. Kate Sr. is still around…making this her third episode. She’s actually the only side character apart from Mr. Ochmonek to reach the three episode mark, and she did them all in a row. Huh. So this must be that Kate Sr. Trilogy I’ve heard so much of nothing about. The other side characters just get introduced, wave to the camera, and then ride off into the sunset. Technically I should be happy that Kate Sr. is still around for that reason alone; this  is  a kind of progress. But she still isn’t much of a character, and since the previous two episodes were practically identical in terms of their themes and conflict, I’m not especially glad to see them tapping the same well a third time. Anyway, Willie and Kate carry boxes around while ALF lays naked on the couch watching them. If you had to distill the entire narrative essence of  ALF  down to three seconds of footage that would loop fo...